Good Fight Exhaustion

Im tired of fighting the good fight when the opponent keeps changing:

the customer
the competition
my own company
my battery

Every day there is a new opponent and while I've (with help) done a good job fighting the good fight and winning, the finish line or judges scorecards keep changing. Just before I'd get to feel the tape across my chest the two Mexican midget twins holding each end of the tape, vanish and I see another mile ahead, 2 Finnish midget twins holding said tape.

Now I could stop where the Mexicans were and take an incredulous look around but no. I only get to breath for a moment before heading towards my pasty white midget friends...but I know now that they'll vanish and reappear a mile ahead as two Mongolian midget twins....smiling, missing teeth. I hate you midget twins.

Rechargeable?

So there are such things as Rechargeable batteries, rechargeable debit cards, rechargable cell phones, etc.



I feel like we are also Rechargeable humans. In a way. After work yesterday I felt like I got hit by a freight train. It was busy from the minute I opened up to the time after I was already supposed to be closed. Now it was a Saturday. Saturday's might traditionally be a day where plans are made to do something in the evening....whatever is your thing.

However, for me, my night consisted of UFC on TV by myself. I feel pretty darn good today and am thinking had I gone to the movies with the wife or hung out like we did on Friday, I'd be toast today. Last night its as if I plugged my ass into a recharger, perhaps on the wall but in this case on 'my chair'. I sat to and fro, leaned in and out, played on the laptop, ate some food, drank some drank, and vegged. My light went from blinky red to blinky green.

I know over time that the more charges you get the less time the charge gives you so perhaps that's when people kick the bucket. Their charger isn't giving them enough juice. Anyways, I'm a little coppertop!

SIX and three

I dont know what it is but working 6 days on and 3 days off is just a crazy rollercoaster.

At the start of your 6 days on youre filled with this sense of that youre about to start a marathon. You're energized and ready for it but you know that it's going to be a long one. You have to make sure you have enough supplies, you've got the right attire on and you're ready to deal with a bunch of crap.

By the middle of the 6 youre still feeling ok but you realize that youre only about halfway there and are just going to have to push on. You've been able to look back at the road behind you and realize that there is no turning back and that you're going to make it if you'll just dig. Dig deeper.

By day 5 you're a little crusty. You're legs are sore and you think it stinks that tomorrow is not your day off like it used to be. It's only one more day and than it hits you.....THREE days off are on the other side of the finish line.

On day 6 you're ecstatic, just plain giddy. You can't wait to be off. You can look back at your six days on and see that youve accomplished X, Y, and Z. You're happy and it is all peaceful in the world.

On your first day off you wake up to birds singing. Amazingly the sun shines down on your abode a little birghter and little warmer than all the other casa's on the block. The mailman brings your mail to the door. The kids next door are washing your car, for fun. While the stock market is falling all of your holdings go up. The grocery store delivers, only to your home. It's just the best day. It's as if you're the star of your own Disney movie and it's just begun.

Day 2 is pretty darn good and you can't believe that at the half way mark you're only half-way done! Things are still good and while the sun isn't shining as bright it's still warm and smiley.

Day 3 is a mixed bag, sweet yet sour. You're excited to have this 'bonus' day off but you begin to look at the next race. You begin to realize that you have to get ready....again. You look forward to the evening but you know that it is simply the harbinger of the next day.

Such is the rollercoaster of the 6 and 3 but there is one wonderful thing about the whole thing. At least you have a 6.

Growing Up Stinks

I went to a friend's funeral today and as Im sitting here at home thinking about this day I've come to realize more and more so that growing up stinks.

This isn't the first funeral Ive gone to but the other funerals allow you to prepare. When my grandparents died on my mom's side, I was much younger and very selfish with my emotions. While i felt sadness their inevitable deterioration allowed me to detach a bit and prepare myself.

When my Granpa Irving died much more recently while prepared it hurt quite a bit and I still miss him and his cantankerous ways. Ill never forget our political conversations. The last few weeks hurt but I was able to feel the hurt which was probably a good thing. I think that that is what youre supposed to feel. That year his favorite baseball team made it really far into the World Series and I just imagined him out there on the field, a ghost, blowing the ball to and fro to try and effect that base hit for the Tigers.

Today's funeral was out of the blue. While I wasn't the closest person to Eason he was still a part of what I know as my 7 Bridges gang and it was truly expected that he would be there whenever a there happened. He was light, bubbly, and at the remembrance service today someone mentioned him saying, "That's messed up." and I could literally see him saying it. I didnt expect to cry. Like I said, Eason and I weren't the best friends of the gang but we certainly were friends and could easily hang out comfortably with one another and share in the same stories and not miss a beat. I was all tears at the funeral.

Misty, his wife, now widow is a very strong person. She has handled this situation with grace and thankfulness that I might have a hard time finding in such trying times. Seeing her at the service speaking has me tearing up while typing right now. She was amazing and her and those that spoke truly show courage in the face of adversity. I'm not sure that as a kid I was capable of feeling it, as a young adult I was prepared, as an adult I felt it but was able to see quality time for the quality it was, but now it just stinks.

Things I Laid Out on the Table at the Cohen Family Meeting

eh it was only funny to me I am sure.

So here's the thing, I may go a week without seeing a customer in my line of work (New Home Construction) but it would seem that when it gets nice and rainy out, y'know, moist. When the ground is so soggy that it just cant take it anymore. When the clouds overhead beckon the four horseman at any moment. That this, THIS day is the day that you Mr and Mrs home shopper decide that not only do you want to go look for a new home but you've chosen this day of all days to have me walk you through the mud through multiple homes under construction, take you to homesites only for you to stay in the car and watch me step off the size of the homesite youre considering, and basically trudge mud and dirt everywhere including on the walls of my model home. How did it get up there!?

I have to ask....while Im trudging through the mud out there and youre in your car, are you laughing at me.

Joaquin, Sorry You Couldn't Be Here Tonight

If you didn't know, JP has left the building. That is all.

A Jewish Pet Coupon Sucker

I suck at keeping my dog's nails clipped so I live in a world of clicking. Click, click, click, click, click. so in one of the mail magazines full of local coupons there is a coupon to get the dogs a bath and their nails clipped. And the angels rejoiced. The dogs, not so much. Anyways, I always look at the savings at that moment. The register starts ringing it all up in my head. If I do it at home it's free but a pain in the tuchus. IF I go to the regular groomer I would use it'd be $80 or so. Not comfortable. So this is a savings of $60! WOOHOO, The Jew in me was jumping around the living room. Sit down. So I get up early this morning, way early, to be first in line so I can get it done before work. Well, this is when the sucking sound began.

The coupon is only good for one dog.
The dog's need some updated shot..........s.

That sucking sound resulted in an unknown amount just yet but they did ask to put a Credit Card on file since my roommate Jessie is going to have to pick them up later.

Damn, I have been suckered by the gentile coupon fairey! Sure the dogs will smell good and they wont click their way around the house but my initial Jew euphoria that was jumping around the living room is now standing on the other side of the porch sliding glass door, arms crossed, tapping a foot and cursing at me behind my back as I type this. He's pissed and we're out of Gefilte fish too!

Crap Salad

So I was shopping at my local grocery store today when I was confronted by an ethical dilemma. Not my ethical dilemma but one in which I jumped into my 'way back' machine to earlier that morning. See earlier this morning the Winn Dixie produce manager had this conversation with himself:

"Self. This bag of premade salad looks like it's going bad. See that Radicchio? it looks kinda reddish anyways, perhaps no one will notice it getting slimy and getting more brown in color. hmmmm, I have a lot of this stuff. It all shares the same qualities in it's clear bag. Maybe I should throw it out and explain to Jim the GM. Hmmm, Jim will be mad and want to spank me.....I've got it! Self, lets go get that roll of $1 off stickers and slap it on the bags! Than they'll move. Good job, self."

Now I stand here, in the present, holding said bag saying to myself, "self, this lettuce looks like crap. This is a Crap Salad. I will not buy you. Crap Salad, not even for a dollar off. " So I look around at Crap Salad's competition, Iceberg, Caeser, shreds....eh, im turned off of salad tonight, as I eye Crap Salad. Thanks Crap Salad, it'll be Texas Toast tonight.

Im a Butt Dialer

Yes I am. I hate my phone. When I got my phone it was glitzy, glamour-y, and it loved me. It showed me what a phone can do when you have a full keyboard on the front of it, it's little bumps like that on those flip floppy Adidas' that the soccer player and wanna be athletes wear. At any time I could just type out anything my little heart can encapsulate in 160 letters, symbols, or spaces, sometimes dots.

But the phone has gotten angry, bitter. She has seen the new wave of phones and her slip is showing. Her self confidence has been beaten much like the corners of the phone and the tip of the little antenna that has the marks that a trip across the asphalt should leave. She's overweight now but that's not really a fault because when she had her coming out party she was curvy just like the rest of them, now she's sloppy. Her face isn't as beautiful as the new breed and she isnt, well, she just isn't as smart as the new girls. She knows it. Ask her to do few things at the same time and she simply gets overwhelmed and needs a nap. Her eyesight isn't as sharp as the new breed and what used to be a lot of megapixels well is lacking against the new squad.

It's a shame but she tries to impress me still. Every now and then Ill notice her doing something on her own like trying to attach to the data package. Why? I'm not sure but it's not that impressive anymore dear. You're still a bit slow, even when you put your heels on.

To top it off, she doesnt work well with others, syncing, copying, emailing, just seems to leave her in the dust while the rest of the class moves on to the next chapter you can see her, in the back of the room, that scared look in her eye, wanting to raise her hand, wanting to ask that question, but knowing that all of the girls in the class will giggle, laugh, and even the teacher will say, "Palm. I understand that you're having a difficult time but now is not the time for me to try and catch just one student up to the rest of the class. You'll have to see me after school for some extra tutoring." Needless to say, Palm will just leave the class when the bell rings, end up in the parking lot bumming a cigarette off of one of the newer laptops who will eventually take advantage of her and break her heart.

It's a shame but it's almost time to trade the old girl in for a newer girl, a faster, slicker, sexier girl who plays well with others, can do all kinds of things at the same time, with a face to die for, and an ability to make even the man whose arm she clings to look good.

Well, I forgot I had this.

So here we are at the Lewis Black concert last night which wasn't as good as it sh/could've been but that may have had much to do with the audience here in Jacksonville than Mr. Black himself as he was as ornery as he ever is, when my friends David and Erin began talking about their Blogs, again when I said I want a Blog. Too. So David and I were talking about getting Ezekial a Blog which is likely in the works as it'll serve more than just a function of me having Diarreah of the fingers all over this keyboard but as a marketing tool for only the greatest concoction of Sweet Tea ever made, MrBrewmans. So low and behold (<--------is that right?), I logged in to become a devoted follower of the two Blogs listed above and TADA! my very own Blog started 'back in the day.' I probably couldve named it something else, but it'll doo. What the hell am I gonna do with this thing now....I'll need to merge it with Ezekial's Blog, hmmmm.